Nutshell Soup
by Myself The Great
Summary: A strange, yet possibly interesting episode-teller action machine that has a cool summary that makes people want to read it. ...I tried. Strange goings ons.
1. st Episode

A/N: I don't know why I posted this, honestly. Just be warned: lots of character bashing and offensive random quotes. Sorry to any die-hard fans out there. Truly, I have nothing against any of the Utena cast XD ...except A-ko, maybe. But there's no cursing, because I'm a good doobie. If you're going to flame it, do it nicely or something (gah! I can't stop!) If you're going to praise it....well, do that nicely, too. If you're going to read it and not review, then...well...just read it and not review. If you're not going to read it, then congrats. You still have your sanity. I'd like to apologize ahead of time for any misspellings. I tried. I really did.  
  
Disclaimer because ff.net says I have to have one or something: I don't own SKU, or RGU, or.uhh.any of those things. The people that do are Be-papas and those other companies that can't dub most of the time. All Rights Reserved with the cool Capsule Corporations thing.  
  
Beginning: OMG, there was, like, this freaky black girl that was hiding in this casket or something, and this prematurely gray black guy came up and licked her face and stuff. He was all like:  
  
BLACK GUY: OMFG, why are you crying?  
  
BLACK GIRL: I don't want to live or something gaseous like that cuz my parents, like, died and stuff. So go away.  
  
BLACKGUY: I can't go away or something until I give you this ring this that a rose graffittied on and stuff, so here. Check ya later, yeah.  
  
BLACK GIRL: Oh, cool, I'm engaged and stuff. Dude, I shouldn't die anymore.  
  
So the girl fell in love with the guy because she drank Love Potion No.9 or something stupid like that, and she wanted to be a freaky prematurely gray black guy, too. Cuz he was a prince and stuff. But the skinny shadow freaks can't figure out if it was a good idea or something.  
  
Episode One: Roses Can't Get Married, Duh.  
  
It's, like, a million years later and that black girl isn't black anymore. She's all tall and stuff and beating some kind of queer basketball team, but she's having a hard time because there's a bunch of rose petals in her eyes and her name is Utena and stuff. And this girl with, like, a gigantic cranial forehead is getting mad because the Utena's playing basketball and not, like, waiting for her or something. So the girl, Wakaba or something tries to throw Utena out a window, but luckily her A+ in PE saves her from the fall. And then the homicidal freak goes:  
  
WAKABA: I love you and stuff, you should die.  
  
UTENA: Shut up, OMG, I'm trying to, like, sniff the roses down there. Hey, who's that totally sausage-filled dude who's, like, holding the other dude's hand?  
  
WAKABA: That's Touga. The other dude's Saionji and stuff, you retard, I can't believe you don't know him or anything.  
  
UTENA: What about that, like, pile of goo on the floor, is she, like, his girlfriend or something?  
  
WAKABA: WTF??? No way, bald crap, Saionji is too perfect and totally in love with me to have a girl with that disfigured rash of a face as, like, a girlfriend and stuff. She's Anthy, she just waters the roses and talks to hybrid monkeys or something totally lame like that.  
  
UTENA: Me like roses.  
  
And then it's, like, later in the day, and that sausage Touga is talking about chickens with Saionji and these two totally craptastic punk-rockers with weird hair and stuff. Touga, like says:  
  
TOUGA: Saionji, you butt-wipe, stop hitting the Rose Bride and stuff.  
  
ANTHY: No, we like rough sex.  
  
SAIONJI: Amen..or something totally agreeable like that. Bye, mouth- sucker.  
  
PUNK #1: That Saionji is, like, totally NOT a radical pumpkin.  
  
But then Saionji, like, publicly humiliates Wakaba or something totally gay like that, so Utena's all like:  
  
UTENA: You freakishly giraffe-like M&M, I'll kill your egotistical hair or something.  
  
SAIONJI: OMG, you're, like, a stud-festival like me. Ok, I'll kick your butt in the forest tomorrow.  
  
UTENA: You flaming moron, the one that nobody's allowed in?  
  
So she, like, goes into the forest and gets poison ivy or something, so she's totally pissed-off and stuff, and she sees this huge door and, like, tries to open it, but it's locked. But Utena, who likes to spit or something, flips some kind of corny switch and water comes and massages these gears or something, so the door opens and.yeah. So she walks up these totally vertically-equipped stairs and stuff and sees Saionji at the top. There's this toenail snot of a castle floating in the sky and stuff, so she goes:  
  
UTENA: What is that, and why does it look so, like, totally suggestive?  
  
SAIONJI: It's a mirage and stuff, so shut up and, like, admire my ring. It's cooler than yours. Anthy, slap a rose on this queer's chest so we can, like, go home and stuff.  
  
ANTHY: If your rose, like, dies, you're stupid and you lose, man. But, like, your teeth are straighter, so I hope you win or something.  
  
SAIONJI: Lies!  
  
UTENA: Stop hitting that freak with a crown, PWA, I'll kick your maximus toosh of a fish to the moon and back.  
  
SAIONJI: OMFG, you won't.  
  
So, they, like, fight, and Saionji cuts Utena's sword into some kind of half of itself or something, but she wins anyway, and Anthy starts, like, stalking her. So does Touga, because fires apparently make him think of total queers with Latin names. But Saionji is still mad and challenges Utena to, like, a rematch or something, and Anthy's all like:  
  
ANTHY: You accepted another duel, and next time you don't have to use that wart of a bamboo sword, you can, like, use me instead. I didn't know you cared and stuff. UTENA: I don't care about you, I've fallen, like, totally in love with your monkey thing.  
  
END  
  
To be continued after the spinning ending theme and stuff.  
  
If you stuck with this story, then...yay. Remember what I said at the top.flame nicely XD I warned you fair and square. ..  
  
....Here's hoping for at least one review... 


	2. nd Episode

Episode Two: Roses Can't Smile, Duh.  
  
Utena's, like, totally being admired by all the lesbians in the school, so she goes into this class and starts talking in Japanese or something. She says:  
  
UTENA: Wakaba, I thought you were freakin' illiterate or something, what are you reading?  
  
WAKABA: This totally awesome graphic novel called Magnolia Waltz. This girl just, like, shaved her head or something so the guy likes her now.  
  
UTENA: Owned.  
  
Later, Touga, Saionji, and the freakish Punks are meeting again, and they're, like, discussing Saionji's totally stupid loss to that new babe in 8th grade. They're all, like, pissed and stuff, because this totally James Brown-esque orginazation, World's End, like, made her a duelist without their permission.  
  
Meanwhile, Utena and Wakaba are walking or something totally macarenaish like that. Wakaba's all like:  
  
WAKABA: OMFG, that gave us different rooms, I'll assassinate the Dean for this. Your dorm's all haunted and stuff because the sacred cockroach god or something pissed on it. Just thought I'd let you know so you could join the Insomniac Club.  
  
UTENA: You should drop by some time so I can totally feed you to the bear cubs.  
  
So Wakaba goes away or something, and Utena walks into her room after playing ping pong with herself against the walls and stuff. Anthy's there and Utena gets all like:  
  
UTENA: Go away, you freaking pedophile.  
  
ANTHY: I'm your new roommate and personal slave. Whip me. And then feed my monkey cakes and stuff so he can get fat and I can eat him later or something.  
  
And if it's not gay enough yet, Anthy shows up late for dinner and Utena and Chuchu ate all of it already or something because she was busy having an affair with Saionji. So the next day, Saionji and Utena have to duel again and Saionji's like:  
  
SAIONJI: I was delirious on weight loss pills yesterday, but today, I will own that dot on Anthy's head again or something totally diplomatic like that.  
  
UTENA: Shut up, I already turned neon pink and won or something.  
  
SAIONJI: I will have my revenge on the moon, wart head.  
  
END.until after that ending song with language issues finishes and all that jazz or something.  
  
.Er.yeah. Experiments abound. Constructive criticism. Flame nicely. 


	3. rd Episode

(.The episode title sounds SO wrong.it's not really, though XD)  
  
Episode Three: Nights Can't Have Balls, Duh.  
  
So later, Utena starts yammering about friends and stuff to Anthy, who's not listening because she can manipulate her level of deafness appropriately or something totally kickin' like that. So Utena starts, like, walking really fast like some kind of mean tape dispenser and everyone calls her 'Utena-sama' because Anthy told them that it pisses her off or something. So Utena's all like:  
  
UTENA: Dude, just make some freakin' friends already. I like whole wheat bread or something totally nasty like that, cuz it's healthy.  
  
TOUGA: Hi, I'm the Student Council President who will have sex with anything with a hole in it, and I'm a whole wheat bread boy. Stand still while I rub this chicken grease off in your hair.  
  
UTENA: Go away, cocktail shrimp. Your milkfish antics won't seduce me.  
  
TOUGA: Ok, then let's just be, like, chums or something.  
  
UTENA: Sick, sick.  
  
Meanwhile, Anthy is bored, so she walks away, and some kind of queer hair cuts come up and slap her or something totally stupid like that. But this bovine-esque blond shoos them away and says:  
  
BLOND: OMG, I'm so popular and I, like, know you're nominated as the dance queen in the Michael Jackson category or something totally off-topic like that. So you should, like come.  
  
ANTHY: Ok, Nanami. I named my chicken after you.  
  
NANAMI: How thoughtful.  
  
So later, this bagel of a Hi!Schooler rings Utena's doorbell and drops off this totally bile-inducing frill fest of a dress sent to her and Anthy from Touga. And Touga's message with the dresses was, like:  
  
TOUGA: See you at the dance or whenever you decide to wear this or something. I bought it for you because I'm all impressively rich and stuff and I thought you should know.  
  
So, like, later, Anthy and Utena are at the dance in their totally roadkill- like bunches of cloth, and Nanami is Touga's sister. So Touga goes:  
  
TOUGA: I wore so much mascara tonight just for you, Utena. I love that dress on you. I picked it out myself.  
  
ANTHY: Thanks for my totally puke-green dress, too, Mr.President.  
  
TOUGA: I didn't send you a dress, you incestuous clam.  
  
NANAMI: Anthy, here, come with me so I can introduce you to my large, blurred mass of friends with no pupils or irises and stuff.  
  
ANTHY: Mm.  
  
UTENA: Oi, she has friends already and stuff. That's, like, such a cool ego boost for me cuz I was right.  
  
TOUGA: Dance with me in that dress or something totally romantic like that. I love you.  
  
Meanwhile, some klutzy faggot sprays nonalcoholic apple cider all over Anthy and it was all Nanami's fault because she's an evil psychotic witch and stuff and Anthy's dress melted because it was actually Nanami's or something and she's some kind of exhibitionist. So Utena pulls a super-man and rips off her own dress to reveal her pointy-like school uniform that shows off her gigantic expanse of legs or something and makes a toga out of a plastic table cloth for Anthy, and Anthy's all like:  
  
ANTHY: OMG, I love you and stuff, you're so nice.  
  
UTENA: I'm sorry, what? Those rose petals are all, like, getting in the way of my lip-reading abilities again. They stalk me, just like you.  
  
ANTHY: That's no coincidence.  
  
NANAMI: OMFG, my plan didn't work! I'll humiliate anyone who, like, is better at Monopoly than me.  
  
TOUGA: Milk duds.  
  
END until Dios stops trying to break break Utena and Anthy's ribs in that strange ending, man.  
  
Another one.mondo thanks to the two reviewers who donated a piece of their time to letting me know how strange this fic is or something.. (darnit.) Reviews are acceptable in MasterCard OR Visa. (I was trying to be clever. Ha. Ha.) Anyway. 


	4. th Episode

Episode Four: Gardens Can't Be Preludely Sunny, Duh.  
  
Punk #1 is playing piano and stuff in this room, and Nanami walks up and TOTALLY starts flirting with him. She nags him about not competing in the piano competition or something totally annoying like that. His name is Miki and Nanami starts, like, flipping through his book and sees a picture of Anthy, which makes her, like, so totally jealous like a frog or something gross like that.  
  
Meanwhile, Utena and Wakaba are in math class, which they're both totally failing like broken flag poles or something idiotic of the sort. And Wakaba goes:  
  
WAKABA: My onion of a mom told me to hit guys over the head with, like, logic or something totally deep and meaningful like that.  
  
UTENA: I can't say 38 three times fast. Darn.  
  
Somewhere else, Anthy is getting beat up again by those stupid hair cuts who're going, like:  
  
HAIRCUT #1: It's so totally your fault that Miki stopped playing the piano because we need someone to like blame and you're freakish enough or something. And that dot on your head goes too well with your shoes.  
  
ANTHY: Der...  
  
MIKI: Shove the hell off and stop picking on my love interest and stuff. Anthy? Hi, I'm Miki-whoops, there goes that blush of mine again or something totally preteenish like that.  
  
ANTHY: Your papers. They, like, fell.  
  
Utena is still sitting somewhere, like, high and stuff and she sees Miki and Anthy because she's all cool like a periscope and stuff. So she asks:  
  
UTENA: OMG, who's that totally cute dude Anthy's stealing from the Australian population?  
  
WAKABA: Oh, that's Miki. He sword fights and stuff and he, like, takes college level classes because he ate Jack's beans as a kid or something and turned into a genius boy with Klinefelter's syndrome.  
  
UTENA: Oh.  
  
Later, Miki is sitting in the library or something totally late-night like that, and Punk #2 notices him and says:  
  
PUNK #2: OMFG, you're grading a retard's paper, Miki, their stupidness might rub off on you. You should stay away from that paper or something totally superstitious like that.  
  
MIKI: It's okay, Juri. It's for a friend.  
  
JURI: Oh. I thought you were all in love with the piano and antisocial or something. Sorry.  
  
Later, Miki is tutoring Anthy, who will never understand Algebra and is making freakishly disoriented flip books. Utena walks in and goes:  
  
UTENA: Oh, dude, you're so lucky to have a tutor. Nobody'll help me cuz, like, they're afraid I'll turn into a car and run them over or something.  
  
MIKI: You can join us if you'd like or something totally polite and unnecessary like that.  
  
UTENA: Gracias, mi amigo. Que pasa contigo o algo totalmente loco y duro entender como eso?  
  
MIKI: Hi, I'm Miki, the Official Student Council stopwatch-clicker or something totally unimportant like that, be amazed by my ring.  
  
UTENA: You disfigured vampire, you're after the rose bride, too. I'll totally freakin' kill you after you teach me what a common denominator is.  
  
MIKI: No, you're sadly mistaken like the missing link between a sponge and a dinosaur. I think dueling is, like, wrong or something, so I don't duel, even though I could own all of your ears* because of my superior fencing skills.  
  
UTENA: You're so cool and stuff. Let's be totally ueber-friends.  
  
Later, Miki comes back to the dorm for another tutoring session with Nanami or something because of his major crush on girls with totally off-white hair colours. Utena greets him, and he goes:  
  
MIKI: Sorry I'm late, I hope you don't mind.I brought Nanami along because she's been eating too many anti-oxidants lately and needs the company of totally radical* weirdos like you.  
  
UTENA: No problem. Anthy's shaving her ice or something totally scratchy like that so that you all can have some sort of deformed snow cone.  
  
During the tutoring, Nanami goes insane because her plan to taint Anthy's image is ruined because there's too many squids in the closet or something totally impossible like that. So she gets mad and Anthy goes away and shows Miki her stupendous harpsichord skills or something that Mikage records for the second OST because Mamiya sucked out all of his creativity or something totally malicious like that.  
  
END to be continued after that symbolic scene where Anthy totally looks like she's going to kill Dios.  
  
*1 - Shameless Diablo plug, I know. But the ears sound so cool when they hit the floor XD  
  
*2 - I just finished a Personal Fitness course. You can't blame me. O__o'  
  
Use Babbelfish if you're wondering what's up with the Spanish. I can't help that I'm Cuban.  
  
That button down there looks pretty appetizing, doesn't it? Y'know. The review one. 


	5. th Episode

Episode Five: Sunny Gardens Can't Have A Grand Finale, Duh  
  
Two people are fencing in this, like, overly huge room that might as well be a glass house for all the viewer cares.  
  
JURI: Watch out, I'm about to hit you with this really long glow stick!  
  
MIKI: Ohhh, no ya won't.  
  
MYSTERIOUS BACKGROUND GIRLY VOICES: No! Miki just poked Juri's boob! She lost!  
  
JURI: You suck at fencing, that's why you beat me. I think it's because you're in love with that ethnically-challenged chick.  
  
MIKI: Posh.  
  
So Miki goes away like some kind of sore-winner or something totally oxymoronish like that, and he spots Anthy who's, like, just staring at this bush of roses like some kind of boring beaver.  
  
MIKI: I've watered your watering can for you.  
  
ANTHY: Oh, so that's where my watering can went. Thanks, Miki. Would you like me to water your feet to make them bigger or something totally idiotic like that?  
  
MIKI: Shh, the ceiling is reminding me of a piano.  
  
Suddenly, Utena prances in on them smiling at each other or something totally non-productive of the sort.  
  
UTENA: Darn it, Chuchu. Would you quit unicycling on that Sprite can and wait up for me or something? -Oh, sorry, were you two having a corny romantic moment....?  
  
Chuchu: Chu.  
  
Later, the four of them go to the music room and watch Anthy play the piano because she likes to press buttons or something.  
  
MIKI: Don't mean to brag, but I SO totally wrote that song with my sister.  
  
UTENA: Quit lying, tooth brain. It's a famous song or something.  
  
MIKI: We played with the piano as our toy and ended up composing a masterpiece like some kind of serendipity mushroom.  
  
ANTHY: ...Let's think about that one for a moment.  
  
MIKI: But then I killed it.  
  
UTENA: Right. I knew you were a pyromaniac.  
  
Suddenly, a bunch of black people show up for a flashback.  
  
BLACK MIKI: Concert!  
  
BLACK SISTER: NEVER! I'd screw up or something because I don't know how to play the piano.  
  
BLACK MIKI: Sure ya do. I'll be sitting right next to you or something cuz it'd be stupid if they gave us separate benches.  
  
BLACK BIRDS: We signify organ flourishes.  
  
BLACK MIKI: I suddenly got the measles. Sorry, sis, you're on your own.  
  
BLACK SISTER: Neeeeeuuuuuu.  
  
The black people sidle inconspicuously away, for the flashback is, like, over and stuff.  
  
MIKI: My sister never played the piano after that. I loved that garden. I loved that piano. I loved that sister. I loved-  
  
UTENA: Ay, Dios mios, there he goes again.....  
  
MIKI: I lost my piano feeling or something, man! But I found it again! Here, in Himemiya's piano or somewhere totally random like that!  
  
UTENA: "It" being the fact that it's a century-old piece of crap or something reality-hitting like that?  
  
ANTHY: So, Utena, when are we going to get married?  
  
UTENA: Shut up!  
  
Later, Miki and, like, the other two punks are talking about chickens AGAIN, and Miki goes:  
  
MIKI: I don't want the duels to continue or something totally self- righteous and impossible like that.  
  
TOUGA: No.  
  
JURI: Mind if I eat that apple? My dorm is in famine season or something totally Alaskaish like that.  
  
The next day or something, Miki tackles his sister like some kind of accurate football player and she goes:  
  
KOZUE: Your papers. They, like, fell.  
  
MIKI: Bug off, bugger.  
  
KOZUE: Fine. Hey, you two! Pretend like you know me!  
  
YOU TWO: Good morning.  
  
So Miki walks into the music room and Touga is there with his shirt unbuttoned. He goes:  
  
TOUGA: Oh, are you here to have sex with me as well?  
  
MIKI: I'll kill you or something.  
  
ANTHY: Sorry to intrude. My skirt's way too short, don't you think?  
  
TOUGA: You should duel, Mickey. Or something totally against your morals like that. Because you want to take Himemiya as your own whipable personal slave, too.  
  
So Anthy and Miki get mad and shoo Touga off and start to play the piano. Miki goes:  
  
MIKI: I bet you were pretty as a kid or something. Dunno what happened to your face along the way, though. Kind of like my sister.  
  
ANTHY: Wow, you're too kind.  
  
MIKI: I'm assuming you like the piano or something?  
  
ANTHY: No, I just spend all of my spare time playing it to trigger your sad childhood memories and get you to duel Utena so that I can get away from her. She NEVER makes the freaking beds.  
  
MIKI: You're so clever. Would you play for me again or something?  
  
ANTHY: If the pink bubble says so.  
  
MIKI: How 'bout if I ask you to play tomorrow or something totally stupid like that since I know what the answer's gonna be anyway?  
  
ANTHY: If the pink bubble says so.  
  
MIKI: Do you have to get Utena's permission for everything?  
  
ANTHY: If the pink bubble says so.  
  
MIKI: Would you stop playing the piano if she asked you or something totally symbolic and close to my heart like that?  
  
ANTHY: Dude, if the pink bubble says so. Get it through your greasy little head.  
  
Suddenly, Miki has a flashback of Touga draped in pink, silky sheets. He decides to duel. He tells Anthy:  
  
MIKI: Never fear! I will protect your gigantic scrub n' bubbles can of wonderful piano playing and stuff!  
  
ANTHY: Gee, thanks so much.  
  
So Miki goes to Utena's classroom since he magically knows where it is and all the girls go:  
  
GIRLS: He's so fine!  
  
UTENA: Hey, Miki! I don't feel quite so retarded now, thanks for tutoring me or something that I already previously thanked you for!  
  
WAKABA: Miki was your tutor? ...Darn it, now I owe myself five dollars.  
  
MIKI: Look at my rose and tremble in fear.  
  
UTENA: Ohh, crap and stuff. You know what this means.  
  
So it's the evening and the skinny shadow freaks come out to do a symbolic skit or something:  
  
SHADOW FREAK #1: I'm a pirate. Look at my mighty row boat.  
  
SHADOW FREAK #2: What's the thing you really, REALLY want?  
  
SHADOW FREAK #1: Ummmm..  
  
SHADOW FREAK #2: Whoops, we've sprug a leak or something totally lethal and deadly like tha-gurggle.  
  
So Utena walks up this gigantic stair case which isn't fair because she starts to get a stitch in her side or something. So this R&B music starts playing and she yanks a metal object out of Anthy's chest. Miki goes:  
  
MIKI: I'll so totally beat you. Juri told me so.  
  
UTENA: Nonsense, rabbit breath, you're doomed to eternal piano-playing.  
  
JURI, FROM AFAR: Dude, she, like, knows his secret.  
  
So Utena and Miki start to, like, duel, and Miki's all determined and Utena's all breathing hard and Anthy goes:  
  
ANTHY: Yo, Miki! Over here! I'm distracting you!  
  
MIKI: Wha--?  
  
UTENA: Hah! Defeatedddd.....  
  
JURI, FROM AFAR: Woah, he was defeatedddd.....  
  
UTENA: That'll teach ya, you blue-haired lava lamp.  
  
MIKI: Why doesn't anybody love me.?  
  
ANTHY: I still feel stupid. Tutor me again?  
  
Meanwhile, Kozue's playing the piano all crappily and she's explaining all to this random girl:  
  
KOZUE: A neighbor of mine wrote me a love letter once. It said "Dude, not only are you hot, but maaan. Your piano playing is awesome! Man!"  
  
RANDOM GIRL: What? You suck at playing the piano.  
  
KOZUE: I know. I never played the piano, it was always Miki sitting next to me who played or something totally fibular like that. But when we had to do that concert and he was sick and stuff, I couldn't play, so I stopped practicing.  
  
RANDOM GIRL: Your bro's so cool, dude.  
  
KOZUE: Dude, when a dude dudes you, you gotta dude that dude back, dude.  
  
RANDOMGIRL: Duuuuude.  
  
Later, Miki walks up to Wakaba and Utena, who, like, has her butt sticking out for some weird reason or something.  
  
WAKABA: And then what happened--?  
  
MIKI: Shut up, you. I'll quote Saionji and say that I was careless yesterday. I won't lose to you next time, fur ball.  
  
UTENA: Wuh-oh.  
  
END  
  
To be continued after Dios's small cape stops flapping in the breeze.  
  
Woah, boy. 


	6. th Episode

Episode Six: Nobody Can Take Care of Miss Nanami, Duh.  
  
Nanami is walking around in the dark somewhere.  
  
NANAMI: Boy, do I love parking garages!  
  
Suddenly, a black car comes and nearly runs her over. There's a loomy man floating off in the distance somewhere near Mexico. The driver goes:  
  
DRIVER: Stupid, stupid duck-loving nail! You almost got run over! ...You know, you're not supposed to do that........  
  
NANAMI: Ooch...my knees.  
  
Later, Miki, Touga, and Nanami are sitting is some sort of raccoon- populated sunlit spot in front of a background with very vague trees and stuff. Touga goes:  
  
TOUGA: Dude! Someone's trying to assassinate you? I wouldn't be surprised like a dog.  
  
NANAMI: Yeah! A pot, like, totally almost fell on my head when I was at Home Depot yesterday or something totally accidental like that!  
  
MIKI: Face it. You're just a klutz.  
  
NANAMI: Help me, lover brother bougenvillia!* I simply cannot stand a spinning globe that cannot comprehend how completely vital, attractive, stylish, and absolutely, monumentally adorable I am!  
  
TOUGA: You should stop reading, man. Those big words confuse me. Excuse me while I go to finish up some work or something.  
  
MIKI: Oh-hoh, you know what THAT means.....  
  
Later again, Nanami is sitting with Miki and her three weird hair cuts. A small package peanut flies through the air.  
  
NANAMI: My brother should be protecting me like a boy with absolutely no life!  
  
MIKI: GOD, siblings are annoying....  
  
NANAMI: Wutchu sayin', Willis?*  
  
MIKI: I mean, how many people have you, like, annoyed in your life so far?  
  
HAIR CUT #1: She never does the dirty work or something you're supposed to read between the lines for and stuff like that.  
  
NANAMI: I swear, somebody wants me dead like an upside down goldfish.  
  
Suddenly, the package peanut becomes a baseball and buries itself into Nanami's forehead or something totally bad-timish like that. Utena comes running up, holding her hat lovingly, and goes:  
  
UTENA: Aww, maan! Do I have good aim or what? Sorry about that and stuff! Hey, where'd the ball go?  
  
NANAMI, MOJOJOJO STYLE: It was you....It was you....  
  
UTENA: Oh, cool! You sound like Igor!  
  
NANAMI: It WAS you or something totally convenient like that! You dropped the pot on my head, you unleashed the rabid logs on me, you pushed me down the stairs!  
  
UTENA: What the Hellven or something totally compounded like that? I think you have something on your nose.  
  
NANAMI: That's all that I can stand!  
  
The hair cuts try to hold Nanami back while she dramatically flails her arms around as if she's some sort of Utena threat or something.  
  
UTENA: Look, whatever, just gimme my ball back.  
  
Suddenly, Nanami isn't a homicidal freak and she starts to walk down this really long hallway with Utena and Miki. Utena goes:  
  
UTENA: You're a flamin' moron, eh? I don't have a motive to kill you or something totally alibi-ish like that.  
  
NANAMI: But my brother wants you or something totally non-related like that!  
  
UTENA: No, he's just in love with my left pinky.  
  
MIKI: Hey, the greenhouse is otherwise occupied with an occupant.  
  
Suddenly, they decide to spy on the people in the greenhouse. They are Touga and Anthy. Touga goes:  
  
TOUGA: Finish the job, you ADHD-prescribed little idiot, you.....  
  
ANTHY: No, I won't!  
  
TOUGA: You must kill. The plan cannot be changed or something to make Nanami get the wrong idea like that. I want the killing done at once!  
  
MIKI: Did you hear that?  
  
UTENA: Yeah, I never knew that potatoes could talk! Shh, I think it's saying something else...  
  
TOUGA: What's wrong with killing vile vermin like them or something almost alliteration-esque like that?  
  
ANTHY: A life is a life, man! If we leave them alone, they might migrate to Canada by themselves!  
  
NANAMI: It's my brother.....it was him all along....  
  
Suddenly, grayscale people show up for Nanami's Looking-Glass-ish imagination.  
  
TOUGA: Oh, yes....nothing can come between us now....  
  
ANTHY: Then why am I a head shorter than you and why is that gigantic, red rose dividing our bodies?  
  
TOUGA: Never mind the rose, we can just drop its pot on Nanami.  
  
ANTHY: Oh, Touga! Mi perra latina atractiva del amante!  
  
The grayscale people get colourful again as Nanami storms into the greenhouse like some sort of dramatic moose.  
  
NANAMI: How could you?!  
  
TOUGA: Uh...........?  
  
Nanami runs away screaming and Miki calls after her in a girly voice or something totally gender-confusing like that.  
  
UTENA: I misjudged you, Touga! ..........it's not your fault, anthy.......... You may be the Student Council President, but you can't just plot to kill your own sister! ...........i'm not blaming you for anything, anthy.............. What kind of a potato do you think you are?!  
  
TOUGA: Uh...........?  
  
ANTHY: Look at my bug spray can and obtain infinite knowlegde or something!  
  
So Nanami is running, sobbing like an ambidextrous chicken who really wants to eat lunch. But a horse randomly escapes and tries to run her over, but before it can, a guy in an ugly teal suit comes and saves her. The horse has a nuclear meltdown and vanishes into the final frontier. Miki and Utena throw their voices onto the screen.  
  
UTENA: A prince appeared and saved Nanami??  
  
MIKI: Yes, just in the tiny dot of time.  
  
UTENA: Hey, that's my job!  
  
MIKI: He left without saying his name or something totally mysterious like that.  
  
UTENA: Sexy, kinda.  
  
MIKI:I didn't think a prince could impress Nanami so much. Isn't she a lesbian?  
  
Suddenly, Miki and Utena don't have to throw their voices anymore. They appear on screen.  
  
UTENA: Beats me. Hey, she's walking toward that idiot with his eyes closed like he's going to collision himself into a wall or something!  
  
MIKI: Is she into older men........?  
  
UTENA: Hey, she's talking to an old, ugly guy with kickin' blue shades or something non-personality-suiting like that!  
  
MIKI: Does she like them plain?*  
  
UTENA: She's talking to a boy with purple legs!  
  
MIKI: She likes YOUNGER men???  
  
BOY: Hi, Nanami, you dropped the whites of your eyes!  
  
NANAMI: Tsuwabuki Mitsuru.........will you go out with me?  
  
UTENA, MIKI, AND THE THREE HAIRCUTS COLLECTIVELY: EH????????  
  
Suddenly, it's the afternoon and the skinny shadow freaks slap themselves onto a wall again. They go:  
  
SHADOW FREAKS: Camping! Yay!  
  
SHADOW FREAK #1: I love eating curry while camping or something totally sicklish like that.  
  
SHADOW FREAK #2: But you're such a lousy cook.  
  
Miki and Utena are eating, since that's what people do. Miki goes:  
  
MIKI: It tastes pretty good.  
  
UTENA: I was talking about Nanami, not the school lunch, you retarded squid. She's dating an elementary school kid or something totally pedophile-ish like that!  
  
MIKI: She's not serious. She just wants Touga. This might be bad.  
  
UTENA: Tastes fine to me.  
  
MIKI: I wasn't talking about the lunch, you dancing pineapple.  
  
UTENA: But if she got Touga, that would be incest.  
  
MIKI: She loves her brother, the only man who's always been close to her or something that you can relate to me as well like that. Everyone else is just parsley to her.  
  
Everybody starts to sprout parsley out of their ears.  
  
UTENA: I KNEW she hallucinated!  
  
MIKI: Look, Nanami and kid are actually hanging out or something brotherish like that!  
  
So Nanami uses Tsuwabuki as a secretary, an answer sheet, and an easel.  
  
UTENA: That's not how you should treat your boyfriend or something that I wouldn't know about like that!  
  
SAIONJI: Even when you're abused, you're still happy to be near the one you love. Yes, love. Love can take many forms. Yes, love. Like the one Anthy and I share. Yes, love.  
  
Silence.  
  
SAIONJI: Hidden love.  
  
UTENA: Who the Hellven asked you?  
  
Later, Tsuwabuki beats up three Hi!School guys or something totally impossible like that because Nanami said so. Utena gets mad. She goes:  
  
UTENA: You can't treat Tsuwabuki like so, Nanami!  
  
NANAMI: Can too. Ja.  
  
Nanami walks away and Tsuwabuki goes:  
  
TSUWABUKI: I don't mind. I saw Touga save her from a gigantic, Bavarian bull once and have wanted to be her cool older brother ever since. Now I must protect her for all eternity and be cooler than Touga. Excuse me while I plot to throw a cactus at her head.  
  
Nanami suddenly appears with recording and stereo equipment or something totally relvolverated like that. Tsuwabuki freaks out. She goes:  
  
NANAMI: It was YOU who did all of those things!  
  
UTENA: No. Kids.  
  
NANAMI: I don't CARE, maaaan!  
  
A kangaroo comes out of nowhere and tries to punch Nanami. Tsuwabuki protects her and his eyes bug out a lot or something totally headache- inducing like that. Utena tries to be a prematurely gray black man again.  
  
UTENA: Stupid kangaroo! I'll kill you with this wooden telephone pole!  
  
The kangaroo punches her away as if she's some kind of melting ice cream cone or something. Utena and Miki make the cutest, fearful, twitching faces as the kangaroo steps forward to introduce them to their maker. Suddenly, Tsuwabuki throws a cactus at its head. Nanami comes and saves Tsuwabuki from doom.  
  
NANAMI: You can't DIE, I need guys like you to be my personal slave since nobody's ever going to beat Utena!  
  
Touga jumps out and kills the kangaroo. A large, semi-circular tooth spins through the air. Chuchu dings a bell. People cheer.  
  
ANTHY: Shut up, you guys! I'm trying to tell Utena that the vermin were killed!  
  
MIKI: Touga never wanted to kill you. He wanted to kill the bugs.  
  
NANAMI: I love you, brother! Tsuwabuki, let's break up.  
  
TSUWABUKI: Adopt me? Please?  
  
The three of them walk away. Utena goes:  
  
UTENA: I just saw Touga with his shirt off. He's quite a guy.  
  
Touga can read minds, so he turns around and flashes her a grin.  
  
END  
  
To be continued after Dios stops having unusually large hips for a man.  
  
Koala.  
  
1*It's Tori. I made a music video to that scene with those words, so it's just like.....can't.....resist...!  
  
2*I have no clue where that's from, but it's hilarious.  
  
3*I REALLY wanted to make a hot dog reference there, but..................bleh................... 


	7. th Episode

Episode Seven: Juri Hasn't Been Filled, Duh  
  
JURI LOOK-ALIKE: Miracles are bad. Hey, don't touch me there!  
  
People are fencing. Squeaks and clangs abound. Miki sits in the corner like a girl.  
  
JURI: You suck. Next! You suck. Next! You suck. Next!  
  
MIKI: Wow, Juri, you just beat, like, seventy-three amateur fillettes in a row. You're so talented like a child who drinks McArthur or something.  
  
JURI: I....do not like show and tell. Hmn.  
  
After locker room blues and student council epaulettes are applied, a strange man with a grayish-coloured business suit walks up to Juri and goes:  
  
MAN: Yo, yo, yo. You're keeping up the tradition like Confucius and stuff. Represent. Will you go out with me?  
  
JURI: Whatever.  
  
In the next window or something totally conversation-splitting like that, the bald guidance counselor is suffering from menopause. She goes:  
  
COUNSELOR: You have no respect for the rules!  
  
UTENA: I have no respect for you, either, man. Can I go now; you're going to make me commit suicide due to lack of interest or something.  
  
COUNSELOR: You brought a pet to school!  
  
UTENA: I only brought my Captain Planet lunch box here. I know that qualifies as a crime to society, but I'm positive that it doesn't break any school rules!  
  
COUNSELOR: Forgetting that you're bringing a monkey to school has always been against school rules!  
  
UTENA: Ok, now you're really BSing me.  
  
The counselor further steams up with anger like a gigantic, chrome tea pot. She replies like the die-hard Pink Panther fan that she is:  
  
COUNSELOR: Do you have a license for your monkey?  
  
Chuchu puffs up in disgust and floats away.  
  
COUNSELOR: OMFG, he ran away!  
  
She runs off to go catch Chuchu, who deviously bounces fifty feet away so that Juri can say:  
  
JURI: Howdee, partnur.  
  
UTENA: ¡Ay, bueno dias! ¿Como estas?  
  
JURI: Muy bien, gracias. ¿Y tu?  
  
UTENA: Oh, muy bien. ¿No está usted en el consejo del estudiante?  
  
JURI: Si. ¿Podemos hablar, Miss.Tenjou?  
  
COUNSELOR: Tenjou, you flaming moron! Come help me catch this haphazard hazard to the majority of the student body or something totally English- bashing like that!  
  
UTENA: Sorry, I have to go deflate my pet now. Coming, Miss!  
  
COUNSELOR: We've got him cornered, shut the door! Quick!  
  
UTENA: ..........I'll refrain from commenting on that.  
  
The man comes back and goes:  
  
MAN: Sorry for the wait, Juri. Vam, let's go.  
  
JURI: There's a guidance counselor in that room over there. Go flirt with her instead.  
  
MAN: Doggonit. My plans are foiled again.  
  
So the VP and the GC prance away while talking about eels or something totally slimy and japanese like that. Utena proceeds to refrain from commenting. Chuchu peeks out of the door.  
  
JURI: So do you have time now?  
  
UTENA: That was a miracle or something totally obviously symbolic like that!  
  
Juri twitches.  
  
UTENA: So people are saying, like the gossiping faggots they are, that you're an Ice Queen.  
  
JURI: I was thinking more along the lines of a wild animal, but whatever.  
  
UTENA: So the rumors are true?  
  
JURI: Tsk. Like I would know?  
  
UTENA: Are you fighting for the Rose Bride as well or something that'll piss me off if you say the wrong thing like that?  
  
Anthy walks out of the rose garden and waves. It's hard to tell if she's carrying a rose or an ice cream cone.  
  
JURI: We all fight for her because of two reasons. One: she makes killer snow cones, man. I mean, WOW. And two? Whomever owns her has some sort of godish power to revolutionize the agricultural system of Utah or something. It's quite cool.  
  
Utena randomly does lunges. She goes:  
  
UTENA: So do I have this 'power' or something that you'd have no clue about like that? Because maybe I could actually pass my Agriscience academy finals with it or something. Are you serious?  
  
JURI: Miracles are bad like a goat.  
  
UTENA: Tru dat. Hey, I hear Christmas bells. I guess that means I have to go before Anthy can catch up with me. Ja.  
  
Anthy suddenly runs up next to Juri but decides to stop there before it looks like she's actually partaking in any physical activities. She hands an orange rose to Juri. Juri suddenly uses her leet slapping skills to strike both the rose AND Anthy's face at once.  
  
JURI: Sometimes, I even amaze myself. Don't get too familiar. Otherwise, I might actually recognize you in the hallway or something.  
  
Suddenly, it's Chicken Time in the land of gothic elavators. Touga starts throwing knifes at Miki.  
  
MIKI: A duel is scheduled to take place this week.  
  
TOUGA: I call seconds!  
  
Miki turns his head, skillfully dodging Touga's blade as he confronts Juri with a single pearl of wisdom.  
  
MIKI: WTF? You don't have a motive!  
  
TOUGA: Hoo-haow! She wants to disprove the power of pumpkins.  
  
JURI: Miracles.  
  
TOUGA: Uh! Miracles. Right. Sorry.  
  
MIKI: But why? How? When? Where? I'm turning into Freud?  
  
TOUGA: Puzzah! Hoah! For the one she loves.  
  
MIKI: But I thought you were just an anti-social girl who's in love with fencing-  
  
JURI: Yes, I was in love...  
  
Flashback time. But the characters are selectively not black.  
  
BOY: Cool, you beat me at fencing. Awesome.  
  
GIRL: Juri. Believe in the miracle that they will one day know your feelings! Take this orange rose and understand why you slapped Anthy for virtually no reason!  
  
JURI: It was she who told me to believe in the power of miracles.  
  
GIRL: I wanted him so much. So I took him away from you. Told him that you didn't like him. I regret my actions. You probably hate me. Everything's going downhill.  
  
JURI: As I read your letter seriously, I seriously realized that my serious feelings hadn't lessened seriously. Whatever happened seriously back in those serious times, I realize that the three of us were still truly serious.  
  
Flashback Juri knocks stuff off of a table. Flashback ends.  
  
Tragedy. Drama. Joyful Utena segway.  
  
It's night time and Utena goes:  
  
UTENA: You're such a wimp, Chuchu! Go to sleep already! Hey, is that you, Juri? Duuude, you're wearing a girl's outfit. Sexy, kinda.  
  
JURI: Hence the fact that I'm female. You're wearing a boy's.  
  
UTENA: Hence the fact that I'm-Oh, nevermind. It's because of my prince or something.  
  
JURI: I'm going to flirt with you. Gasp in shock.  
  
Utena gasps in shock. She goes:  
  
UTENA: Miss Juri?  
  
Juri leans closer, about to steal a kiss, when all of the sudden, teenage hormones run rampant-  
  
JURI: OMG, I HATE YOU!  
  
UTENA: Aww, man. I thought I was going to have a lucky streak there for a moment.  
  
JURI: The locket will overpower the ring. Haha. You don't deserve it.  
  
Utena kicks Juri in the stomach. If Juri had been pregnant, she would have had a miscarriage.  
  
UTENA: My ring's the only link I have to him! Neu!  
  
JURI: Prove me wrong! Show me a miracle or something that doesn't relate to this conversation at all!  
  
UTENA: ................ Der.  
  
JURI: I'll force an answer out of you with my steely sword!*  
  
Later:  
  
ANTHY: Rabbit dance!  
  
Later:  
  
SHADOW FREAK #1: I can't go to the zoo! I'm so happy!  
  
SHADOW FREAK #2: No you're not.  
  
SHADOW FREAK #1: ...............Am I truly so transparent?  
  
So Utena and Juri are duelling. Utena's losing like a constipated amateur. Juri's all like:  
  
JURI: When's your miracle going to kick in, you stupid girl?  
  
UTENA: Rawr!  
  
Utena suddenly looks like Dios. Then she doesn't. Then she does. Then she doesn't. Then she does. Then she doesn't. She almost knocks off Juri's rose, but Juri screams about miracles again really loud and knocks Utena's sword away.  
  
JURI: You're done for.  
  
The sword comes down from the sky and knocks Juri's rose off.  
  
JURI: *dies*  
  
UTENA: Oh-hoh! Another ego boost!  
  
ANTHY: Realize, bay-beh.  
  
JURI: I say, I say, I resent that remark.  
  
Suddenly, we realize that Juri's heart doesn't belong to the boy from the flashback, but, rather, to the girl! A revelation is made! A new sexuality is realized! The viewer is stunned!  
  
JURI: I hate you, I hate you all.  
  
END  
  
To be continued after I stop celebrating the Marlin's win of the world series.  
  
That won't be for a while, mind you :D  
  
1. Steely sword is the funniest thing in the world if you say it right. If anyone with no life is interested, I'll send them a sound file.  
  
Hoh-ho. 


	8. th Episode

Episode Eight: You Can't Get High Off Of Curry, DUH  
  
Nanami and the hair cuts are spying on Utena's class because Ohtori is magically arranged so that, if you're at a really high place, you can see through rooftops or something  
  
NANAMI: They're having cooking class, just as I predicted.  
  
HAIR CUT #1: ...Well, that's because we looked at their schedule-  
  
NANAMI: Silence, baboon.  
  
HAIR CUT #2: I'm off to go set their heads on fire.  
  
NANAMI: Hoho.  
  
HAIRCUT #1: Wait, that's the wrong spice!  
  
NANAMI: Smithereens make me smile.  
  
And so, Hair cut 2 puts some kind of idiotic powder of suicide in Anthy's curry and Anthy and Utena blow up, skillfully not hurting any other student in the classroom. Nanami's all like:  
  
NANAMI: Whups.  
  
So Touga calls a meeting. He's like:  
  
TOUGA: So they exploded or something.  
  
MIKI: It's all my fault because I like spicy curry.  
  
JURI: Quiet, you. That's impossible; spicy curry tastes like crap.  
  
TOUGA: Let's all be morbid just for the hell of it. Whoops-there goes my cell phone like an egret-hey, they got released? The both of them?  
  
JURI: ...Darn.  
  
So Anthy and Utena are walking and Wakaba's all like:  
  
WAKABA: Make love to me!  
  
And jumps on Utena's back, but Utena slides down to the floor like some kind of soggy hot dog.  
  
WAKABA: Pardon me! I should have guessed that you had sprained kneecaps or something!  
  
UTENA: *sighs girlishly* That's okay.  
  
WAKABA: Wow, you sound like Anthy. That's really sick, but it kinda turns me on.  
  
And Anthy is somewhere else being harassed by the haircuts again. They're all like:  
  
HAIRCUT #1: You've been defiant! I think it's because you're hanging out with that girl who's hell-bent on becoming a construction worker or something! Be punished.  
  
Nanami is spying on them. Miki comes up and goes:  
  
MIKI: Boo.  
  
Suddenly, the haircuts slap Anthy. Anthy gets all:  
  
ANTHY: Heh-ull, naw.  
  
And slaps them back like an alligator that's been poked too many times. So they go:  
  
HAIRCUT #1: That's, like...REALLY scary or something. I mean, not even my mother, like, slapped me OMG like.  
  
ANTHY: That's because she was a perra just like you.  
  
HAIRCUTS: Oh, no! She cracked her knuckles, run away!  
  
So later, Anthy's playing basketball like Michael Jordan or something. She's all like:  
  
ANTHY: Ooh...I look good in spandex. I'm off to go jump over fences and play ping-pong now.  
  
UTENA: Ooh...I look good in spandex. I'm off to go water some flowers, suck up some tea, and be docile now.  
  
The haircuts come to a brilliant conclusion and tell Nanami. Nanami's all like:  
  
NANAMI: They've switched personalities like all of the other main anime characters in the world? This cannot be like a shrubbery!  
  
RANDOM GIRLS : Like, OoMmGg...these pictures are so interesting or something.  
  
NANAMI: You're SELLING YOUR EVIDENCE???  
  
HAIRCUTS: Well, duh.  
  
TOUGA: Hey, Utena's got an apron on. I've never seen THAT one or something. Can I get a pack?  
  
ANTHY: So YOU'RE the one responsible for this!  
  
UTENA: ...Yo.  
  
NANAMI: Yes, it was I!  
  
TOUGA: Stop laughing, you mentally-disabled chunk of swamp. Go off to India and fix this.  
  
NANAMI: Sure thing.  
  
HAIRCUTS: Wait for us!  
  
So the shadow freaks are on the wall again and they're all like:  
  
SHADOW FREAK #1: Divine Justice!  
  
SHADOW FREAK #2: If you rob a bank, you'll be impaled. Don't ask, don't tell.  
  
So Anthy's running around all over the place because she's all magically athletic and she jumps over this really high thing that's blocking the whole track. Utena goes:  
  
UTENA: You're so awesome, Utena!  
  
ANTHY: Stop clapping, it makes me nervous. We've REALLY got to switch back. I'm dreading wearing that god-awful nightgown of yours tonight.  
  
UTENA: Don't worry, Nanami's doing just fine like the ninth cloud or something.  
  
Later:  
  
NANAMI: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!  
  
Later:  
  
ANTHY: Saionji's been hitting on me. I feel so violated like a green M&M.  
  
UTENA: It's okay, he leaves you alone after the first time.  
  
ANTHY: Wha--?  
  
SAIONJI: Come with me like you always do or something because Utena suddenly won't mind.  
  
UTENA: Have fun! *massivewink*  
  
SAIONJI: Let me just make you think that I want to have sex.  
  
ANTHY: I'm not loo-king, I'm not loo-king...okay, maybe just a little peek.  
  
SAIONJI: Now, take our diary home.  
  
ANTHY: A diary? Why does me life suck so bad...?  
  
So later, Anthy's at home and she goes:  
  
ANTHY: I am SO not writing in this.  
  
UTENA: Then I'll SO totally throw it away.  
  
ANTHY: No! You're such an extremist.  
  
UTENA: *slowgrin* *muffledcackle*  
  
ANTHY: Fine, I'll write in it. Hey, he drew me looking ugly with no hair and squiggly legs! That's it; it's payback time.  
  
So later, Anthy returns the diary to Saionji and Saionji's all:  
  
SAIONJI: OMG, I love you, too!  
  
But the diary really says:  
  
DIARY: DUMB ASS!  
  
So he gets all sad later.  
  
But the good news is Nanami's back with the spice and everything will be back to normal!  
  
NANAMI: OMG, I look like Anthy with a wig.  
  
ANTHY: You're really in NO place to talk about that right now, ya shtick.  
  
But Nanami slips and spills the spice like the alliteration queen that she is and everyone's all like  
  
EVERYONE: Noooooooo or somethingggg...  
  
So they're all eating dinner together and Utena's serving curry. Anthy's like:  
  
ANTHY: Eww.  
  
But then we discover that the spice wasn't really what caused the explosion and it was just Anthy's cooking all along! Miki's all like:  
  
MIKI: Wow, Himemiya! That's really-sorry, I keep on looking at the wrong one -really cool! A curry that can switch personalities!  
  
UTENA: Wow, thanks!  
  
ANTHY: You're an idiot.  
  
SAIONJI: Anthy, I can't believe you'd write this or something! It must be because Tenjou's such an uncultured wart of a clod! Now write it over-ooh, curry? Me have? Puedo?  
  
UTENA: Try it.  
  
CHUCHU: Chu.  
  
ANTHY: But wait, that's-  
  
UTENA: A new invention!  
  
Everything explodes again.  
  
WAKABA: So when you guys woke up, you were back to normal?  
  
UTENA: Yeah. But my kneecaps were really sore afterwards, so I'll never eat curry again.  
  
ANTHY: That's a shame; I just finished making curry for dinner.  
  
UTENA: Shut up. Just shut up.  
  
WAKABA: But as hot as Chuchu is now with Saionji's personality, what are we going to DO with him?  
  
SAIONJI, OFF IN THE JUNGLE EATING BANANAS: Chu. Chu. Chu.  
  
And then a train runs him over.  
  
THE END  
  
To be continued after Dios stops cloning himself in that stupid ending, man.  
  
Oyeoye-good news! My site's up. If you'd like to go see, the url is in my profile.  
  
Please tell me what you think! 


End file.
